{"id":1691,"date":"2024-03-05T18:49:12","date_gmt":"2024-03-05T09:49:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/?p=1691"},"modified":"2025-04-08T18:56:54","modified_gmt":"2025-04-08T09:56:54","slug":"story-do-we-need-to-use-partner-en","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/lgbtq-en\/story-do-we-need-to-use-partner-en\/","title":{"rendered":"\u3010Manga\u3011Do We Really Need to Use &#8220;Partner&#8221;?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>When it comes to referring to couples or married couples, terms like &#8220;boyfriend\/girlfriend,&#8221; &#8220;husband\/wife,&#8221; have traditionally been commonly used.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>However, in recent years, there seems to be an increase in using the term &#8220;partner&#8221; as a neutral way that doesn&#8217;t specify the gender of the person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>You might also have experienced using or hearing the word &#8220;partner&#8221; in your daily life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Some people might find it &#8220;annoying&#8221; or &#8220;too much&#8221; to use words that intentionally avoid specifying the other person&#8217;s gender.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In this story, we will introduce the episode of A, who had doubts about whether it&#8217;s necessary to use the term &#8220;partner.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_72 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-custom ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title-container\">\n<div class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">\u76ee\u6b21<\/div>\n<span class=\"ez-toc-title-toggle\"><\/span><\/div>\n<nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/lgbtq-en\/story-do-we-need-to-use-partner-en\/#Heterosexuality_Is_Not_%E2%80%9Cthe_Norm%E2%80%9D\" title=\"Heterosexuality Is Not &#8220;the Norm&#8221;\">Heterosexuality Is Not &#8220;the Norm&#8221;<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/lgbtq-en\/story-do-we-need-to-use-partner-en\/#Problematic_Terms_for_Partners_What_Do_You_Want_to_Be_Called\" title=\"Problematic Terms for Partners: What Do You Want to Be Called?\">Problematic Terms for Partners: What Do You Want to Be Called?<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/lgbtq-en\/story-do-we-need-to-use-partner-en\/#Conclusion\" title=\"Conclusion\">Conclusion<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Heterosexuality_Is_Not_%E2%80%9Cthe_Norm%E2%80%9D\"><\/span><strong>Heterosexuality Is Not &#8220;the Norm&#8221;<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Have you ever found it &#8220;troublesome&#8221; or &#8220;inefficient&#8221; to use the term &#8220;partner&#8221;?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>But behind the &#8220;troublesome&#8221; and &#8220;inefficient,&#8221; there are people who feel they are being &#8220;erased&#8221; every day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As seen in the manga, assuming from the start that someone&#8217;s partner is of the opposite gender and using terms like &#8220;girlfriend&#8221; or &#8220;boyfriend&#8221; is an act of presuming the other person&#8217;s heterosexuality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Using neutral terms like &#8220;partner&#8221; is a way to<strong> show respect for the other person&#8217;s sexuality without assuming heterosexuality as the default<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Imagining that &#8220;the person they&#8217;re dating might not be of the opposite gender&#8221; is something each person can do, and it could contribute to creating a more inclusive space for non-heterosexual individuals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Problematic_Terms_for_Partners_What_Do_You_Want_to_Be_Called\"><\/span><strong>Problematic Terms for Partners: What Do You Want to Be Called?<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Japanese offers a variety of expressions for referring to a partner, but have you ever thought about how you&#8217;d like to be addressed?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Among the names that you may have casually used, you might find some words that leave you feeling uneasy when you contemplate their meaning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Terms to address wives, such as<strong> &#8220;\u5ac1&#8221; (yome), &#8220;\u5965\u3055\u3093&#8221; (okusan), or &#8220;\u5bb6\u5185&#8221; (kanai)<\/strong> are already less commonly used, but they carry nuances such as <strong>&#8220;the person who stays inside the home and does household chores&#8221;<\/strong> or &#8220;<strong>the person who serves the man.&#8221;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Regarding names for husbands,&nbsp; <strong>&#8220;\u3054\u4e3b\u4eba&#8221; (goshujin) and &#8220;\u65e6\u90a3\u3055\u3093&#8221; (dannasan)<\/strong> are frequently used. However, they imply a <strong>master-servant relationship<\/strong> and are deeply rooted in the <strong>traditional patriarchal family structure where the man is the head.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>While some people may use these terms with the intention of showing respect towards their partner&#8217;s family or simply as verbal conventions, those on the receiving end of these labels might still feel discomfort even if they don&#8217;t express it openly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When it comes to how spouses address each other, using names or nicknames, or gender-specific but not discriminatory terms like &#8220;\u59bb&#8221; (tsuma) or &#8220;\u592b&#8221; (otto), can be more appropriate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In a 2017 online survey, it was revealed that <strong>among spouses, women expressed a preference to be called &#8216;\u59bb&#8217; (tsuma) the most, making up the largest portion at 23 percent<\/strong>. However, the same survey also found that<strong> the term &#8216;\u5ac1&#8217; (yome), which is less favorable, was the most frequently used<\/strong>. This indicates a<strong> gap between the name individuals want to be called and the name they are actually addressed with<\/strong>. There is no one correct way to address your partner, but using the name the person prefers is beneficial for the relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Furthermore, terms like &#8216;\u5f7c\u5973\/\u5f7c\u6c0f&#8217; (girlfriend\/boyfriend) or &#8216;\u59bb\/\u592b&#8217; (wife\/husband)<strong> limit the referred person&#8217;s gender to either male or female<\/strong>. You cannot deduce a person&#8217;s gender identity from their biological sex, and being in a heterosexual marriage doesn&#8217;t necessarily dictate one&#8217;s gender identity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In this regard,<strong> the term &#8216;\u30d1\u30fc\u30c8\u30ca\u30fc&#8217; (partner) is gender-neutral and carries the least discriminatory meaning<\/strong>, making it the least likely to hurt someone&#8217;s feelings. If the term partner doesn&#8217;t sit well with you, alternatives like<strong> &#8216;\u9023\u308c\u5408\u3044&#8217; (tsureai: life partner)<\/strong> or more formal words such as <strong>&#8216;\u914d\u5076\u8005&#8217; (haigusya: spouse)<\/strong> or <strong>&#8216;\u4f34\u4fb6&#8217; (hanryo: companion) <\/strong>can be used.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Previously, Palettalk shared a manga story about addressing one&#8217;s partner as &#8216;\u4f34\u4fb6&#8217; (hanryo: life partner) or&nbsp; &#8216;\u3054\u4f34\u4fb6\u3055\u307e'(gohanryosama: a polite way of saying \u2018hanryo\u2019).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Simply addressing them by their name, instead of saying &#8220;someone\u2019s partner&#8221;, is a great\u00a0 approach too!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Conclusion\"><\/span><strong>Conclusion<\/strong><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In this discussion, we explored the term &#8220;partner&#8221; in comparison to other forms of addressing one&#8217;s significant other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>While the use of &#8220;partner&#8221; has gradually become more prevalent, it still appears to be in the minority when compared to other labels. As more people realize that <strong>the everyday terms they&#8217;ve been using might have been based on assumptions of heterosexuality or a binary view of gender<\/strong>, it&#8217;s hoped that in the future, we may see the emergence of more inclusive terms that replace &#8220;\u59bb\/\u592b&#8221; (wife\/husband) and make room for everyone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\uff08Translation: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/jennys_english_qlass\">Jennifer Martin<\/a>)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When it comes to referring to couples or married couples, terms like &#8220;boyfriend\/girlfriend,&#8221; &#8220;husband\/wife,&#8221; have traditionally been commonly used. However, in recent years, there seems to be an increase in using the term &#8220;partner&#8221; as a neutral way that doesn&#8217;t specify the gender of the person. You might also have experienced using or hearing the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1674,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34],"tags":[136,193],"class_list":["post-1691","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lgbtq-en","tag-lgbtq-en","tag-misgendering"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1691"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1691"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1691\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3174,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1691\/revisions\/3174"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1674"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1691"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1691"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/palettalk.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1691"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}